A to B Sides

 

 

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At first glance, this song speaks to a war, a battle.

But not on the B-side. On the B-side you’re there with him and as the song begins to play….

You’ve had a big fight. Mama crabs been wrong, Papa crabs been foul. More foul and more hurtful than either of you care to admit.

But your heart. Your heart.

“Aiming for the stars with a point & hollow” is not quite what you meant to be doing. The love runs deep but you don’t know what to do with it because no ones ever had the power to bring that out in you. And the words and fights and hate all culminate…. at 2:15…, as you climax and cum from the deepest part of your frame and reframe and then reframe again and realize the negative was what you needed to get through to the light. You wanted an easy luv?

“Matter over mind if we’re being honest”. ❤️

🎤: Cautious Clay

📺: Insecure, HBO

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The B-Sides: Selfish?

CC only recently heard this song. The circumstances are not important☝🏽. But crablings I swear, if could write the remix, this would be it. Sing along.

 

Jealous

by crabbychique

I’m jealous
I want you all to myself
I swear
You don’t need nobody else
I swear
I want you all to myself
Because I’m jealous, yea
…..
You don’t need nobody else
I want you all to myself

Now that I got you
Here boy
I’m not gon’ play wit you
Because there’s a lot of things
That I wanna say to you
Boy you know you the ish
Audemars Piguet on ya wrist
Bishes all on your dick
But we not gon’ trip
Cause I’m not ready for quick commitments
And I swear i hate seein you with them
Yea, yea
And I know you ain’t tryna just own me
And I know your emotions are lonely
I can’t help how I feel
I’m just keepin’ it real
They can’t have you boy

Because I’m jealous
I want you all to myself
I swear
You can’t touch nobody else
I swear
I want you all to myself
Because I’m jealous, yea
I want you all to myself
I swear

Can’t help it
You know I get stuck when you
Come around
And them base ones be sick ’cause we be on some shit
Yeah they know I’m gon’
Hold you down
Hold hands in da whip
Tell me how you been wit your ends
We gon’ go to the crib
Make some drinks… cookin’ up a dinner
Boy I know I’m fuckin’ with a winner
Ain’t Nothing like these reckless ones I swear
Name a place, I’ll follow wit you there
I’d do anything to make you laugh
And you can have anything just ask
But just know that I’m jealous
And I swear I can’t help it
But it’s all for you
Yea it’s all for you

I’m jealous
I want you all to myself
I swear
You cant love nobody else
Yea

Signs from God

CC always says that the stars don’t lie. It’s my firm belief that He doesn’t either. Religion is the rules, in the stars lie the possibilities.

Not too long ago and unfortunate incident happened after a really nice night. I was with a papa crab near and dear to my heart and parked badly. Like really badly. I guess we were excited. This resulted in my car not being there in the morning. And To make a long story short, a wild goose chase in trying to find it.

I was upset. Part of me knew I shouldn’t have been there that late. CC took it as a sign from God.  But that was a (mostly) good thing.

Yes I shouldn’t have been there, but I was, and got to hear about the new venture he was a undertaking. And yes I was scared and upset but he helped me find the car and we went, picked it up and my heart calmed down a bit. Maybe the sign was things are never going to be easy, but you find a way.

What happened after that is I don’t know what. See, CC comes from a product of divorce, for reasons that are unimportant right now, but that I will always remember. It was a different set of signs that maybe, I don’t know, I just have to re-examine to get rid of my fears.

Is his venture successful? I don’t know. Why wouldn’t it be? He’s super smart, has a good heart, and works really hard. He’s going to be really good at it. All the signs say so.

~CC

Can’t help but wonder

Make no mistake, this song is not CC singing. I’ve made mistake made mistakes and lived through so much that I’m “a ghost when I walk in, Holy spirit when I  walk out”..

Is this what we’re doing here?  Because I’d really like to understand. Run me til I don’t want, luv, or respect you?

No, this song is one I wish was sung to me. With love poured out instead of hate; visceral instead of venomous. Like you.

🎧♥ CC

 There is a scene in that silly movie Bruce Almighty, a scene that probably no one will remember, where Grace is sobbing in her bed and praying ‘God please help me let him go, please help me let him go’… She missed him in bed with her,  after he had be such a d**k to her, living it up, taking her for granted and …..and CC wants you to know that if you too ever find yourself in that place….you can just walk over and shake her hand 

Doc~umentaries 💊

CC has always had a love for medicine. Not many people know this and CC has never really pursued it. Probably because she feels like this about test taking -> 😖😔

But this Saint James School of Medicine keeps popping up so randomly, with open houses in beautiful locations in the city. Although CC is not
sure how it found her…it is inspiring….

image

Med school options in Bonaire and Anguilla, no MCAT required, school next to unpolluted beaches and tranquility.

So many things can be done there.
And to be honest, who knows what the city still even holds for her?

CC is not sure she can save lives, but help heal them…. Who would think?  😷🎥

Johnny Cash: Open your mouth… Open your mouth…
June Carter: No… I don’t trust you…
Johnny Cash: Oh, June don’t say that…
June Carter: I don’t…
Johnny Cash: Yes, you do… now open your mouth…
[June opens her mouth, but John snatches away the peanut from her again]
June Carter: [hits John ] John, you are a mean man! You’re a mean man, and I knew it… I knew it all along..

June Carter: Ya’ll can’t walk no line.

 

~walk the line

💗CC

basketball life

What does love, in your heart, mean to you? Perfection, or realness? Thank u to the responders. Lol. Basketball was my metaphor, for Inspiration..Sometimes it happens in a moment & you forget people can see. So no, I dont ask for a ‘performer ‘..only my superstar who shows me the way.. who puts his best in the world and with me even though its not easy, if that makes sense? Thk u for reading

What is love anyway?

Cc was in love with a police officer once. And he lovvvvved her.. And she loved tall, handsome OfficerCrab 👮🏽 deeply too. Sadly, even though it seemed perfect it didn’t work out. Maybe sometimes..Anyway, in this life’s court, PapaCrab will be the leading scorer.. Playing offense for us maybe if that’s who he is.. as long as he could just be, be himself..for CC to run with, keep him well, with little things, and in her heart…
And everything I am and everything I’ve done… was meant to love creatively, and patiently.. So that in those times when he’s weary or at rest or helping me win…
CC has done her part to make sure the home team stays fly. goodnite~🏀🌺

5 Things…random thoughts for today

5…CC doesn’t appreciate when people use the Bible to justify selfish motives and hateful thoughts. It’s like someone drank a tall cup of judgment and just spit out some scripture. Not cool. But how do you say that to your friend?

bflies4…Was ~relax, relate, release ~ not the best advice ever?

3…Can we discuss this R. Kelly and those leather pants/leggings?

2. CC wonders if you have ever felt it is possible to not be alone soemtimes, but still feel lonely

..however..

1. I am alive today to write this…with someone, somewhere alive and well enough to read it..and for that I am thankful

CC


true luv is when we’re finding sensuality in all we do together
being ourselves no effort or judgement
Desire plus Action in a watercolor dreamteam
I tried to paint u…guess my colors weren’t beautiful enough
This is what I want
~CC